Pamiętnikiem opiekuje się Ann385

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Sobota, 09 Sierpnia, 2008, 14:47

Tajemnica Brown'a

Przepraszam, �e tak d�ugo si� nie odzywa�am... Jednak kto� z mojej rodziny by� powa�nie chory i to sp�dza�o mi sen z powiek, wi�c nie mia�am weny nawet do my�lenia, a co tu m�wi� o pisaniu.

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Obudzi�am si�. Przez pierwsz� minut� stara�am si� przypomnie� sobie gdzie jestem, to ��ko nie mo�e by� tym w moim rodzinnym domu, bo jest zdecydowanie za wygodne. Powoli zacz�y dop�ywa� do mnie fakty… Tak, jestem w swojej nowej szkole. Podnios�am leniwie r�k� i spojrza�am na zegarek-12:00… Musia�am by� wyko�czona po tych wra�eniach z poci�gu. Jak to dobrze, �e zaj�cia zaczynaj� si� dopiero jutro… Z trudem wsta�am, przetar�am oczy i podrepta�am do �azienki. Wesz�am pod prysznic, a sp�ywaj�ca z niego woda pozbawi�a mnie ostatnich �lad�w snu. Ubra�am si� i postanowi�am wreszcie si� „zadomowi�”, wypakowuj�c rzeczy z kufra. Po p� godzinie by�o wida�, �e ten pok�j jest naprawd� m�j. Na szafce nocnej dwie fotografie oprawione w drewniane ramki, na biurku zeszyty, bloki, kredki i farby, w �azience zawieszony m�j ulubiony b��kitny szlafrok. Nagle Dalia zacz�a natarczywie domaga� si� wyj�cia na spacer, wzi�am j� na r�ce wysz�am z pokoju i zamkn�am drzwi na klucz. Opu�ci�am budynek i skierowa�am si� do ogrodu, gdzie inni studenci delektowali si� ostatnim dniem wolnego i pi�kn�, s�oneczn� pogod�. Zamiast na �awce usiad�am w cieniu, pod drzewem. Wypu�ci�am kota i zaj�am si� badaniem otoczenia. W ogrodzie by�o du�o r�nych kwiat�w, krzew�w i drzew, na �rodku niczym kr�lowa wznosi�a si� ogromna, bogato zdobiona fontanna. Patrzy�am na Dali�, kt�ra usi�owa�a z�apa� motyla, gdy nagle us�ysza�am:
-Cze��
-Hej
-Ksi�niczka ju� wsta�a? -Spyta� z lekk� drwin� w g�osie Jim.
-Czepiasz si�, by�am bardzo, ale to bardzo zm�czona.
-Dobra, rozumiem. –Powiedzia�, poczym usiad� obok mnie.-Jak zamierzasz wykorzysta� ostatni dzie� wolno�ci?
-Sama nie wiem, chyba rozejrz� si� po mie�cie, a co?
-Nic, tylko tak sobie my�l�… Dasz si� zaprosi� na lody?
-No pewnie, a gdzie s� wszyscy?
-Poszli do miasta, brakuje im jeszcze kilku ksi��ek. Chcieli ci� wzi�� ze sob�, ale nie otwiera�a�, Nan by�a ju� gotowa wywa�a� drzwi!
-Mam wra�enie, �e nawet Armagedon by mnie nie obudzi�.
-Wiesz, jaka jest Nan- dosy� szybko si� zniech�ca.
-Tak w�a�ciwie…-powiedzia�am.-Ja o nich prawie nic nie wiem… Mo�e tylko jak si� nazywaj�, w co lubi� gra� i �e nie maj� poj�cia o magicznym �wiecie.
-I tyle ci wystarczy, jeszcze zd��ysz ich pozna�.- Zapewni� mnie Brown.
-Dlaczego nie jeste� w Hogwarcie?- Waln�am prosto z mostu.
-A, co przeszkadza ci, �e jestem teraz tu, z tob�, a nie 500kilometr�w dalej?
-W�a�nie tego w tobie nie lubi�, odpowiadasz pytaniem na pytanie… Nagle znikasz, nagle si� pojawiasz i nie masz najmniejszego zamiaru czegokolwiek wyja�nia�… Przecie� nie mo�na tak �y�… Jim, za wiele ode mnie oczekujesz… Nie b�d� udawa�, ze nic si� nie dzieje.- By�am troch� podirytowana. A on? Tylko przygl�da� mi si� z uwag�, z lekkim u�miechem na twarzy… To jeszcze dodawa�o oliwy do ognia… Go nic nie obchodzi, on chyba uwa�a, ze tak jak jest, jest dobrze, �e mo�e mie� setki sekret�w, a ja? Ja nie b�d� o nic pyta�, tylko przyjm� go z otwartymi ramionami.
-Musisz zrozumie�, �e jest wiele spraw, w kt�re nie mog� i nie powinienem ci� miesza�. A dlaczego nie jestem w Hogwarcie? Po prostu nie chc� tam by�… Zbyt wiele miejsc, zbyt wiele os�b przypomina mi o pewnym zdarzeniu z poprzedniego roku.

Co to za zdarzenie? Jaki jest kolejny sekret J.B*? Te pytania k��bi�y mi si� w g�owie… Przygl�daj�c si� jak Dalia usi�uje z�apa� ju� nie motyla, ale pszczo��, my�la�am tylko o tym by zacz�� jeszcze bardziej dr��y� temat. Po chwili uzna�am, �e to bez sensu…, �e dowiem si�, kiedy indziej, �e zaczynam przesadza�, ze zaczynam si� robi� nadwra�liwa.

-Co tak zamilk�a�?
-My�l�, nad tym, co powiedzia�e�…
-I, do jakiego dosz�a� wniosku?
-Jakiego? Takiego, �e twoje ca�e �ycie przypomina gr�… Przeskakujesz z pola na pole byle tylko nie da� si� zbi�… Czasem zaatakujesz, ca�y czas zmieniasz twarze byle tylko nikt nie m�g� ci� pozna�… I my�l�, �e kiedy� ci� to zm�czy, �e ju� nied�ugo dowiem si� o tobie wszystkiego. A teraz… Mo�e p�jdziemy ju� na te lody?

Po 15 minutach siedzia�am w ogromnym, wygodnym fotelu, w kawiarni „Lotos”. By�a bardzo przytulna, jej �ciany zosta�y udekorowane wystaw� obraz�w przedstawiaj�cych wszystkie ciekawe zak�tki miasta. Z radia s�czy�a si� cicha, �agodna muzyka, kt�ra oddawa�a odpowiedni klimat.
Do stolika podesz�a pulchna, zabawnie wygl�daj�ca kobieta. Mia�a na sobie lnian� sukni� si�gaj�c� do ziemi i niezliczon� ilo�� korali. U�miechn�a si� i powiedzia�a:
-Witamy w naszej kawiarni, czego pa�stwo sobie �ycz�?
Jim spojrza� na mnie pytaj�cy wzrokiem, a ja odpar�am:
-Poprosz�…- I tu spojrza�am na kart� le��c� na stoliku- Zimny Owocowy Mix.
-Dobrze…-Mrukn�a kobieta zapisuj�c co� zawzi�cie w swoim notesiku-a pan?
-Ja chcia�bym Czekoladowe Kr�lestwo.
-Znakomity wyb�r-Powiedzia� kobieta, poczym zabra�a karty i podrepta�a w stron� kuchni.
-Wymarzone miejsce do rozm�w, co?- Stwierdzi�am.
-Tak… W�a�nie, je�li chodzi o rozmow� to musimy pogada�.
-A mo�esz mi wyt�umaczy�, co teraz robimy, jak nie rozmawiamy?- Zapyta�am z u�miechem. Szczerze m�wi�c, zaskoczy�am sama siebie tym doskona�ym humorem. No ju� taka jestem…
-Ale nie rozmawiamy o tym, o czym powinni�my, mianowicie… Musimy pogada� o tym, co si� sta�o w poci�gu.
-Du�o rzeczy si� tam zdarzy�o…
-Przecie� wiesz, o co mi chodzi.
Wiedzia�am, chodzi o ten poca�unek… Wiedzia�am, te�, �e tej rozmowy nie da si� unikn��…, �e na kilka pyta� b�d� musia�a szczerze odpowiedzie�.
-Och, wiem…-Odpar�am.
-Wi�c czy to znaczy�o, ze chcesz da� mi jeszcze jak�� szans�?
-Mo�e,…ale tylko wtedy, gdy zaczniesz mi m�wi� prawd�.
-Masz poj�cie, jakie to b�dzie trudne?- Za�mia� si� -Ale dobrze, b�d� ci m�wi� prawd�.
-To mo�e zaczniesz od powiedzenia mi, kto to jest?- Wyj�am z torebki bia�o-czarne zdj�cie pi�knej, u�miechni�tej dziewczyny w moim wieku, kt�ra by�a obejmowana przez Jim’a.
-Sk�d to masz?- Zapyta� lekko przestraszony tym, co zobaczy�.
-Pami�tasz jak w poci�gu kaza�e� mi wys�a� sow�? A raczej, gdy ja zaproponowa�am, ze to zrobi�?
-Tak, pami�tam, ale co…
-Szuka�am w twoim kufrze jakiej� kartki i pi�ra… Wtedy z zeszytu wypad�o to zdj�cie…, Wi�c, kto to jest? Czy ona ma cokolwiek wsp�lnego z tym zdarzeniem z poprzedniego roku?
-Tak, ma…-Nie doko�czy�, bo w�a�nie pulchna kobieta podesz�a do naszego stolika nios�c dwa puchary z deserami.
-Smacznego!- Powiedzia�a i odesz�a.
Gapi�am si� w swoje lody z owocami i my�la�am nad tym czy dobrze zrobi�am, pokazuj�c Jim’owi to zdj�cie… Jednak, je�li mamy by� razem to przecie� nie zbudujemy dobrego zwi�zku na „trupach w szafie”. Nie mo�e by� sekret�w i tajemnic… Musi by� szczero��.
-Wi�c?- Ponagli�am.
-To Johanna, by�a �lizgonk�, ale inn� ni� wszystkie. Byli�my ze sob�, ale pewnego dnia… Pope�ni�a samob�jstwo… Po prostu… Podczas jednego z trening�w dru�yny �lizgon�w, wzbi�a si� w powietrze na miotle, stan�a na niej i zeskoczy�a… Nie mia�a szans, pomoc nadesz�a za p�no…- Powiedzia� z wielkim �alem i b�lem w g�osie.
Zamar�am, z otwartymi ustami, by�am zszokowana… I nagle zobaczy�am, �e to wszystko zaczyna wreszcie do siebie pasowa�…, �e Jim mia� powody, aby nie m�wi� mi wszystkiego.
-Ale, dlaczego to zrobi�a?- Wydusi�am z siebie pytanie, na kt�re bardzo chcia�am otrzyma� odpowied�…
-To nie ona… Raczej: g�upio to brzmi, lecz okaza�o si�, �e by�a ofiar� zakl�cia Imperius… Kto� ni� kierowa� jak marionetk�… To musia� by�, jaki� czarnoksi�nik… Nast�pnie okaza�o si�, ze przed �mierci� Johanny jej ojciec nie zgodzi� si� pom�c pewnej… niebezpiecznej grupie ludzi… �mier� c�rki to chyba mia�a by� zemsta, lub gro�ba.


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*J.B-inicja�y od Jim Brown

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