TYLKO MY POWIEMY WAM PRAWDĘ!
Główny redaktor "ŻONGLERA" Nika1310
Do dnia 30.04.2007 Redaktorem naczelnym była Herbina

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Niedziela, 28 Stycznia;, 2007, 13:59

K³amstwa Korneliusza Knota! - autor Marius Maniac

Nasza gazeta ju¿ pó³ roku temu ujawni³a najbardziej strze¿on± tajemnicê, która mog³aby spokojnie zdyskredytowaæ obecnego ministra magii na terenie Zjednoczonego Królestwa – Korneliusza Knota, lat 52, zamieszka³y(najprawdopodobniej, kto wie, jakie machiny kryje jego „zamek z XIII wieku”!) w Sussex. Opinia publiczna nie zareagowa³a na SPRAWDZONE doniesienia dotycz±ce zreformowania praw ¿ycia trytonów na terenie Anglii. O, niedowiarki! Tym razem musicie zareagowaæ i odwo³aæ kandydaturê ministra na Wiceszychê Wizengamotu – KNOT CHCE WYCOFAÆ MIOT£Y I ZAST¡PIÆ JE TESTRALAMI!
Wiadomo¶æ ta nie by³aby tak szokuj±ca, wszyscy wiedz± bowiem, ¿e testrale zosta³y sklasyfikowane przez Ministerstwo Magii jako „niebezpieczne” tylko po to, by idealna orientacja tych stworzeñ nie naprowadzi³a niedu¿ej garstki ministerialnych urzêdników, którzy nie weszli w koszachty z tym tchórzem, Knotem (chce zniszczyæ ministerstwo, by sam obj±æ w³adzê, ale zamiast zostaæ ¶miercio¿erc±, przeprowadza swoje eksperymenty w DEPARTAMENCIE TAJEMNIC!), na znaki jego pseudolegalnej dzia³alno¶ci „maj±cej na celu zapewnienie obywatelom bezpieczeñstwa”1 (taa, bujaæ, ale nie nas!).
Je¶li chodzi o miot³y – maj± z tym wiele wspólnego cz³onkowie zespo³u Armaty Chudley’a, którzy, jak donosz± ¶wietnie zakamuflowani reporterzy, zamierzaj± dokonaæ zamachu na fabrykê „B³yskawic”, najlepszych miote³ wy¶cigowych, a tym samym wyeliminowaæ korzystaj±cych z us³ug tej firmy przeciwników i awansowaæ na ósme miejsce w lidze!
Poprosili¶my o komentarz kilku anonimowych urzêdników Ministerstwa. Twierdz±, ¿e nasza udowodniona teoria to „stek g³upoty, zmieñ miesiêcznik, kochasiu, mo¿e jacy¶ mugole wezm± ciê na pizzaracci (cokolwiek to jest – komentarz autora)”, ale wiemy, ¿e zrobili to z fa³szywej lojalno¶ci – w koñcu trzeba gdzie¶ pracowaæ....
B±d¼cie ¶lepi, obywatele, ale i tak wyjdzie na nasze! I jeszcze co¶ – jeste¶my TYGODNIKIEM!
1„Prorok Codzienny”, to paskudne siedlisko k³amstw i zabobonów!

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